Restoring Order

I’d like to be able to say that I went on some sort of artistic sabbatical or something. I’d like to be able to say that I purposely took a break from writing and photography and everything else artistic. But neither is true.

I’ve been thinking about this quote that I heard a while back.

“You almost have to be a little diluted to stay motivated.”

BOOM. My truth.

This truth has been stuck in my head and has been whirling around in there every since I heard it…swishing through my non-diluted, too realistic thoughts like nobody’s business.

And the thing is…

for me…

it’s true.

I lost my motivation for a bit. I lost the motivation to be creative in the simplest of ways. And I guess I have to be OK with that. I can’t force it. I’ve learned that much. I can miss it…but I can’t force it.

And as I’ve sat patiently in that place…I’ve missed the order that creativity brings to my life. To others…it may seem the opposite. To others…the, often flighty ways of any artist, makes them a bit “quirky,” or “erratic,” or “unpredictable.” But to me…I need it to feel grounded.

So here I sit. Typing and deleting and editing and fumbling with rambling thoughts…trying to will myself back from the edge of discouragement that the lack of motivation brings. For someone who typically has a love affair with words…I strangely don’t have much to say.
Except that I find it sad when beautiful moments are reduced to a facebook status or even worse…a tweet. But that seems to be my case these days. Here are some of my favorite moments from my days of “going dark” on the ole’ blog.